A Special Time

I just had to say "no" to something.  It is so hard to say "no" to good things...especially when everyone just assumes you will say "yes."  To many observers who don't take the time to find out why I said "no", it will not make sense.  And saying "yes" would have been the easier path to take.

My daughter is joining American Heritage Girls this year.  When I turned in her paperwork, I let the leadership know that I want to attend with my daughter because this is going to be our special time.  The person I was speaking with threw up her hands in rejoicing...because my daughter's group has no leader yet.  I quickly said "no" about being the leader, which was accepted without argument.  But then the other person started talking about my being a "helper."  I was told I would be trained and it would be fine even though I had never before set foot in an AHG meeting.

I left that night being unsure of what to do.  On one hand, if I didn't help out, who would?  And would my daughter even have a group to attend?  But I had made her a promise...this time I would be all hers.  This would be our time and she would be my main focus.

She does not get this type of opportunity often, and she is growing up.  She's reaching an age where I need to focus more on training her and discipling her.  We need to build memories together that do not always include her brothers or involve my telling her to wait until I have finished helping another child in one of her other activities.

At this point, I volunteer in her AWANA program and in some of her Sunday morning kids' worship times.  I am also preparing to be an assistant teacher in her co-op class.  But I am not just there for her.  In fact, she has a brother in each of these times with her so even if I were only there for my children, she would still be sharing me.  But I'm not just there for my children.  I am there to serve and lead and assist with a group, and our children know that.

Even at home I am rarely able to give her undivided attention.  She  has an older brother on the autism spectrum, which means outside therapy appointments.  It also means that he needs some extra one-on-one instruction with his academics.  And she has a younger brother, who is simply the baby of the family.  As the baby is known to do, he just finds ways to get attention for himself.  So she is the only girl and the middle child, and she sometimes gets lost in the shuffle.

So, for now I have said "no."  I just hope my "no" can remain a "no" throughout this upcoming year.